Got Guilt?

When you read this, what is your reaction? What is the first thing that pops in your mind? By asking you that question there is a strong possibility that it will trigger feelings of guilt and shame from the past.

Is that guilt real? Or is it just perceived? The litany of questions could go on.

I'm convinced that the enemy of our souls wants us to feel guilty for things that we do not deserve. This is called, "false guilt."

We're all born with a conscience. Some are more active than others. Psychologists call it an "internal parent." A person's conscience could be under active if one choose a consistent course of thought and action that conflicts with the truth. An overactive conscience condemns oneself for imaginary faults.

This could be a quagmire.

For the Christian, one can find forgiveness from sin, the violation of truth and disobedience to it against God or another person.

Here is an existential definition of guilt: it is the negative feelings for doing something wrong; having "crossed the line."

Here is a definition of shame: it is the negative feelings that you are a bad person.

There is a difference between guilt and shame. Guilt comes from something that you did wrong. Shame is feeling like you are a bad person. Seeing the separation of these two is important.

Shame comes from guilt. If you get rid of the guilt, then you can get rid of your shame.

I John 1.9 says, "If we confess our sins, he [God] is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

You can do that with a simple prayer to God.

When you confess your sins to God, and He forgives you, then you are no longer guilty. He does not hold it against you. You are forgiven, guilt free.

I John 3.19-21 says, "By this we know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us [false guilt], God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God."

You can gain confidence with youself by not allowing false guilt to hinder your life. And, God's plan of forgiveness also brings confidence before Him as well. Sometimes you might find yourself feeling ashamed, like you are a bad person, for something when you are in the right. This is when someone tries to lay a guilt trip on you, when you don't deserve it. Recongizing when we do, or not is crucial to gaining confidence in ourselves and before God.

O.K., so here's the catch. When we confess our sin, we also need to repent from it. Repenting means making a 180 degree turn-around. If you are going in the wrong direction, then turn around and go the right way.

"But, Chaplain, I don't think I'll ever be perfect?" You are right. Neither of us will on this side of Heaven. That is why I John 2.1-2 says, "But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. He is the propitiation [forgiveness] for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world."

What do we get when we receive God's forgiveness? G.A.C.E.

G-God's
R-Riches
A-At
C-Christ's
E-Expense

We get something awesome that we don't deserve. Jesus Christ stood in for our punishment on the Cross. He was our substitute. He stood in for us when we deserved punishment from God. Romans 5.8 says, "but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

When we trust God through Christ with faith in our hearts in Him that he will forgive us then that brings spiritual transformation in our lives. We are free from guilt. The Apostle Paul wrote, "If anyone is in Christ, s/he is a new creation, the old has gone and the new has come" (2 Cor. 5.17). We can know this and experience this every day.

Guilt is part of the make-up of our human nature. There is always a line of tresspass somewhere: with God, people, laws. Do you need forgiveness? Trust Christ, and God will forgive you. You do not have to be burdened with guilt, nor live with shame.

Hey, one more thing: if God forgives you, don't you think you should forgive yourself? Don't hold yourself to a higher standard than God. When should you stop feeling guilty? When you confess the wrong, and repent, walking in God's love and truth.

No more bad feelings from the past, nor feeling like a bad person. Now, go put this into practice with prayer, repentance, and walk in God's love and truth.

Someone needed that today. Maybe it was you.

Blessings.

3rd Brigade Combat Team, 82D ABN DIV Arriving Home

My 56 Mike Leads the Way

SGT Derrick R. Hobbs, 2-505 PIR at Green Ramp, Pope AFB/Ft. Bragg, NC.

Derrick, may your homecoming be blessed! I'm not too far behind.

Veterans Day: Some Important Thoughts about Operation Iraqi Freedom

This is our HHC Company at Joint Security Station Beladiyat taken after the End of Tour Award Ceremony.

While eating my last meal in the dinning area at JSS Beladiyat I happened to be sitting across from one of our TERPS--Interpreters. Since the polling data in the U.S. has been abominable regarding our mission here, I thought because it was my last night I'll ask his opinion about the invasion of Iraq in 2003 and how things have progressed. Essentially, "What's your opinion on the whole matter?" Being honest, I was very unsure about what he might say.

But he told me over and over again like this, "I'm telling you. I'm telling you. I'm telling you. It was a good thing." So, why was it a good thing? He told me that he was a Kurd, which I didn't know. And, back in 1988 about an hour drive from his home 5,000 people in that village: men, women, and children were killed by chemical weapons when an Iraqi jet dropped WMD on them.

The link provided will tell you a lot more than just one incident. Thousands of villages were destroyed. Just Google the topic and there is documented evidence and graphic pictures all over the net. The Kurdish people were brutally oppressed. It was on December 30, 2006 that Saddam Hussein was executed for crimes against humanity from a different incident involving the execution of 148 Iraqi Shiites in the town of Dujail in 1982.

The list could go on and on. At FOB Loyalty where my "home base" was for 6 months of my deployment, the building which our headquarters was housed used to be a jail and torture chamber where victims where hung from hooks off the ceiling, like a slab of meat, and their blood would drip down a sloped floor into a drain in the corner.

As the many polls cite above, the military personnel, VETERANS, who have fought hard and bravely during Operation Iraqi Freedom (OIF) deserve much greater credit than the majority of our citizens provide them in regard to the incredible success they have accomplished despite the overwhelming opinions against their mission. Indeed OIF Vets have been supported; though the majority of opinion was and is against what they were doing. They soldiered on even though the call across America has been, "Bring the Troops Home Now."

You must know that people like the Interpreter with whom I talked during one of my last nights in country say, "We love America, and thank them for what they did."

Read what Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki said to our Troops on July 26, 2006:

US Embassy press release titled "Remarks by President Bush and PM Mailiki at Lunch with Military Personnel and Families":

"...We are happy to be partners in this holy task of fighting terrorism and establishing democracy. Iraq, because of what you have offered, because of what your sons have offered, your families have offered, has now moved from dictatorship to democracy; from oppression, torture chambers, chemical weapons, and now into a state of freedom, liberty and partnership... And we are confident that we will succeed, because you, and people like you are helping us to confront terrorism -- terrorism that is spreading in our land -- with foreign support."

A CBS News Poll from 9-12 July 2009 asked this question to Americans:

"Which do you think most Iraqi people are feeling right now: grateful to the United States for getting rid of Saddam Hussein, or resentful of the United States for having taken military action against Iraq?"

Answer: 44% believe that the Iraqi people are resentful for the invasion. And, 38% grateful.

Clearly that is a misperception on behalf of the American people because the vast majority of Iraqi people do not feel that way.

What America has done through her military forces has removed an oppressive megalomanic who was responsible for the deaths of nearly a million people through the initiation of the Iran-Iraq War, the genocide of the Kurds, the Invasion of Kuwait, and the oppression of his own people.

The Veterans of OIF can be proud that they have provided true Justice, Freedom, Democracy, and a regional ally in the Middle-east.

Sometimes the American people need to lift their eyes off themselves and look around the world instead of only asking, "what's in it for me?"

And finally, though I am a different religion than most of the people in Iraq, I am persuaded that there has been a ring of the Divine to provide true justice to the oppressed and freedom to it's people.

Happy Veterans Day to all Vets, but especially OIF Vets.

Chaplain Paul Lynn

Out of the Box

I'm "out of the box."

The term "inside the box" is used during a phase at the Joint Readiness Training Center (JRTC) when it's an intense time of over-realistic training. It's a years worth of experience compounded in a span of days. Well, my year is almost up.

I conducted my RIP (Relief in Place) with the replacing Chaplain, the BN Commander pinned a Bronze Star on me, I jumped in the back on an MRAP, climbed in a Chinook (pic. above), and arrived at BIAP (Baghdad International Airport) at zero dark thirty in the morning.

I had sent a ton of my stuff home so that I wouldn't have to carry as much as I brought into country. I remember SGT Hobbs and I estimating about a 120lb pack, herking it in from Kuwait up to FOB Loyalty last Dec 2008. When I was stepping off the Chinook I said to myself, "I'm not going to do this again." That is, bring this much stuff.

Well, sure enough, someone needed a hand because they had multiple bags. Tons of stuff going in. Tons of stuff going out. It's just another way to serve.

I am very thankful to the Lord, and His Saints for such wonderful support in so many different ways. I made over 70 missions "outside the wire" to Joint Security Stations (JSS) visiting Paratroopers; only 3 were done by helicopter. The bulk were by MRAP or 1151 HMMWV.

So, I'm out of the box and waiting for my freedom bird.

Pro-Life Health Care Bill Passes House

From the Gray Lady: "Both sides credited a forceful lobbying effort by Roman Catholic bishops with the success of the provision, inserted in the bill under pressure from conservative Democrats."

“We think that providing health care is itself a pro-life thing, and we think that, by and large, providing better health coverage to women could reduce abortions,” said Richard M. Doerflinger, a spokesman for the anti-abortion division of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.

“But we don’t make these decisions statistically, and to get to that good we cannot do something seriously evil.”

Great effort!

Movie Review of New Iraq War Film

There is a new Iraq war film out called, "The Messenger." No, it's not about Islam. It's supposed to be about the life of a Casualty Notification Officer (CNO), starring Woody Harrelson. This review from the N.Y. Times discusses the fact that Iraq war films have been underwhelming. The closest film to get it right, and I still didn't like it was "Hurt Locker." I didn't see all of the Hurt Locker, it just didn't hold my attention; though it was dramatic it felt slow and choppy.

In the Messenger, there is no flash bang, it's all about dialogue and drama. Just reading this N.Y. Times review about the movie, it makes no mention whatsoever about the Chaplain's role in handling Casualty Notification. Any Chaplain who has done a number of these will tell you it is probably the most difficult job they will ever perform. Chaplains know from training and experience that they are not only there to support the bereaved, but the CNO! Sometimes it's the Chaplain who has to hold it all together. I can't remember a time that I didn't pray with the CNO before he delivered the news. There are lots of variables to consider as one approaches this situation. Having just read this review, if they chucked the Chaplain out of the film, then they've just missed a big piece of reality.

Apparently Harrelson's character just returned from a deployment to Iraq and has taken this position as a CNO. Notice in the picture above that he is not wearing a combat patch on his Class A uniform, right shoulder sleeve. It's very unusual for an officer not to have it on his uniform. As you can tell, the NCO to his left is wearing it. If they don't get little stuff like that right, they will get written off like all the other Iraq war flicks.

Frontlines Spiritual Warfare

This picture was painted by Michelangelo circa 1487-1489. It is St. Anthony fighting off demons. Here is a short version of the story, and here is a longer version of a bio of St. Anthony. I read Athanasius' Life of St. Anthony many years back, and though one might have to discern your way around it, it definitely had some take-aways to ponder. And, thus I use his life as example for this ministry experience below, among others as way of reference.

One of the most unique ministry experiences I had while deployed occurred at a JSS located a stones throw from Sadr City.

One night while lifting weights (not too much) in the gym, there was quite a bit of chatter and laughter coming from the company commander's table that was a few feet away from the gym. He called out to me something like, "Hey Chaplain, you're gonna need to go exorcise that room up there." And, the guys around the table were laughing. I took it kind of like a joke, and was hanging out with another Trooper doing our gym time, so I didn't pursue what he was talking about.

Later that night I bumped into a bunch of guys who stopped me and told me that they were not kidding. That there was some really creepy stuff going on in the one room where there are 2 super-duper Paratrooper squad leaders living. So, I inquired further.

I ended up seeing one of the squad leaders not too much longer after that. He had bandages rolling up his arm and it appeared he had burn wounds on his neck, face, and arm. I asked him what happened and he said he didn't know. He had a huge blister on his arm that was popping up about 2 inches high and about 3 inches or more in circumference. He was pretty angry and upset. And, this is what he told me:

A dark figure had been coming into his room on a regular basis in the middle of the night. He and his roommate would hear the door open and see this figure standing there. Eventually, the figure on one occasion entered the room when the other squad leader was in there sleeping by himself. This thing, picked him up out of bed, and threw him on the floor and pulled a huge satellite dish off the top bunk to crash down upon him. This squad leader is no small guy. This guy was freaked out, and didn't know exactly what to do.

Then, the Trooper that I was talking with, the one with the second degree burns that went from his arm to his upper lip told me his story. The dark figure opened the door when he was alone sleeping. He sat up to see it. The figure then caused a spark to appear like a cigarette lighter. As the Trooper was sitting up in bed watching this about 5 feet away, all of sudden he started to feel a burning sensation all over the areas of his body that I had just described. And, he started yelling, "I'm on fire, I'm on fire!"

So, I went to the room and heard these stories in detail from both of these guys. Let me tell you, these guys are not push-overs. They are high-speed squad leader Infantry Paratroopers. They are in incredibly great shape and highly professional. But, when they were telling me their stories in their room, their eyes were as wide as saucers and completely freaked out.

I asked them if they wanted this spiritual harassment to stop. And, of course they did. I addressed in a general fashion that any sin issues in their lives needed to be cleaned up. And, I prayed with them. Then I anointed them with oil, and told that "thing" in prayer to go to hell and never return to harass them. My chaplain Assistant was with me, and I asked them to go down the hall while I prayed in the Spirit and anointed their room with oil on the inside and out, especially the door.

SGT Hobbs told me later that in the hallway one of them said to him, "Wow, the Chaplain told that thing to go to hell!" Sure, that's where it belongs. I thought that was pretty funny. But, Jesus says, "Don't rejoice that demons are subject to my Name. But rejoice your names are written in Heaven."

That place was turned over to the Iraqis. But, every time I went back to visit that JSS I asked those guys if they had any more problems. And, they said, "No." Well, I don't think I'd ever send up a Powerpoint Storyboard slide to Corps indicating a "Best Practice," but, it's sure one to put in the ministry history books on this deployment.

"Chaplain, I didn't know you could do an exorcism?" Sure, why not?

Looking Back

Here is a brief article from WSJ about Soldier-to-Soldier Attacks; motivations vary. One can certainly connect the dots. But, there are still a lot more questions than answers. The right people will sort them out among military and civilians at one level.

As we know, this behavior by anyone is intolerable and unacceptable. However, the one who is on the brink, it may seem completely rational, though it's totally evil. To ask the question of the one who has already gone off the cliff it is too late. But, the question to America is, "Where does one get a world view that it is reasonable to commit such egregious acts?" Is the record high suicide rate in the military a product of a crumbled or incomplete world view as well? I think so. The world view is latent in the one who commits the acts. The stress and strains of military life may only push one to the point where the failed world view spills over into tragedy.

I believe we are in a spiritual and moral wasteland like America has never experienced before. The long-war on terror is just bringing out what is already within us. And without revival we're doomed to slip farther into darkness. This last statement sounds so hopeless. Yet, I am hopeful. The absence of war, or the education of certain fundamental values could help stem the tide. But ultimately, that's not the answer either. Educating garbage is just garbage that is educated. What is latent in America is still reality, whether we want to take a good look inside of ourselves or not. What is needed is transformation. Only the Truth will set us free.

Thoughts and Prayers for Soldiers and Families of Ft. Hood

As I've read through the the N.Y. Times and the Washington Post last night, browsed through Foxnews.com and CNN.com, the media brought out different angles of the story. Many of them had contradicting thoughts.

Many of you are now having contradicting thoughts. This is the classic 1. Shock, 2. Anger, 3. Denial, 4. Bargaining, 5. Depression or some kind of variation of Elizabeth Kubler Ross's Stages of Grief. It's natural to be feeling this way. It might be worth your while to Google it.

It's easy to be the arm chair critic right now. I've had some very angry thoughts that I would have liked to blog. The conversation is happening everywhere: the water cooler, the kitchen, the Internet, from your neck up, or any place where people get together to gab. I've decided not to be the critic on this blog. I can connect the dots just like anyone else. Is it not obvious? Or is it?

What it boils down to is this: it is a very sad moment for our country and military. And right now, most of all, Ft. Hood and Families need your prayers and support. May the Lord provide comfort in this great time of need.

A Post Post Reformation Day Post

I just finished reading Mark Batterson's Evotional blog titled, "Do we need another Reformation?" His short answer is, "yes."

Just a few days ago I wrote a Post Reformation Day Post basically saying that I wouldn't place a picture of Martin Luther posting his 95 Thesis on the Wittenburg Door on my blog. I still hold to that. It's important to have doctrinal boundaries and know what you believe. If you analyze what I'm saying I hope you will get this point: It's more important to be for something, than living your life against something. Let's not live in the past because our work is still cut out for us.

I read this passage almost every day in my Palm Pilot. "Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit. Let him turn away from evil and do good. Let him seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil," (I Peter 3.10-12).

I concur with Luther in his 95 Thesis, and I whole-heartedly agree with Mark that we indeed need a new Reformation, re-capturing something that we have forgotten. (And, I can't wait to read his book, "Primal.") We haven't forgotten Luther's work and the theological boundaries that are now in place. What's the point of rubbing it in the Catholic's face?

Luther is a milestone, an important one, in Church History. But, we can't stop there. The Reformation principle that the Church always needs to reform herself is true. The Church hasn't arrived. Ephesians 4.13 is incomplete, "until we attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ."

The context for this is the gifts that God has given to the Church. It is incomplete. The Church is underdeveloped. And, there is a big job ahead of us. What are we missing? What do we need to rediscover? I'm going to check out what Mark has to say.

Dangles

This is Dangles. He is a beloved dog by our Paratroopers on this JSS. I can't leave here without posting about Dangles.

There is a difference of opinion, culturally speaking, on how Americans and Iraqis view man's best friend. Dangles has been around us since our first platoon arrived here in December of 2008. Dangles got his name because someone decided to shoot him, and everyone thought he ran off to die. But Dangles emerged, a tough old dog, with a permanent limp and a back leg that just . . . dangles. Ergo, his name.

When I took this picture, he had flies all over him. A new Sergeant that arrived complimented the dog in front of me, trying to scatter the flies off of him as I took his picture. Americans just love Dangles.

Dangles even tried to run with me on three legs when I took my PT test in July. He owns the place. If you think he's a mild mannered canine and he's there to be pushed around, you'll have to think again. No one who taunts this dog will get away with it. He will love you, but he'll also make you respect him.

Although I've just written some flattering words about a wounded dog, I can't help think about the analogy of Dangles to Christians. I think about the book that Henri Nouwen wrote, "Wounded Healer." Though all of us have been tainted by sin, those who allow Christ in our lives will emerge not just with God's Spirit, but we will rise again in the Resurrection to eternal life someday.

Though God's Spirit lives in us as Christians, we are still touched by sin in and around us. We no longer have a mortal wound that will lead us to death, but we still carry around with us the effects of it. We are like Dangles.

Dangles is one confident canine. Everyone who meets him is impressed by this dog. Christians in the same way can be confident that God has got our backs, that He loves us, and will never forsake us, and He empowers us by his Spirit. The same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead can live in you. Do you want that?

Every time I saw Dangles I didn't feel pity for him; he was a living reminder of what God wants to do in me.

The Spiritual and Physical Athlete

While deployed to Iraq I've reflected a lot about being an ascetic. In the Early Church there was a group called, "The Desert Fathers" that many sought spiritual insight from. They were considered Spiritual Athletes.

Here is a broad definition of an Ascetic. Simply put, an Ascetic is considered to be a Spiritual Athlete. As a Chaplain deployed to the desert, obviously without my wife and children there are ascetical qualities that are inherent. Yet, it's not just spiritual self-denial, but maintaining good physical conditioning through Physical Training (PT), even during deployment to a desert. There is a physical addition to the ascetical life as a Chaplain.

Here is an oldy but goody article that Eugene Peterson wrote for Christianity Today about the Ascetical and Aesthetical qualities of following Jesus. It's a great read. I've highlighted an excerpt, getting down into the weeds of a Christian definition of following Jesus, utilizing the ancient definition of ascetic and how it relates to the Christian life today.

"The ascetic. This is God's no in Jesus. Jesus' words are succinct and stark: "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me" (8:34). The ascetic life deals with life on the road.

The verbs that leap out of the sentence and pounce on us are "deny yourself" and "take up your cross." Renunciation and death. It feels like an assault, an attack. We recoil.

But then we notice that these two negatives are bracketed by the positive verb "follow," first as an infinitive, then as an imperative. "If anyone wants to follow" opens the sentence; "you follow me" concludes it. Jesus is going someplace; he invites us to come along. There is no hostility in that. It sounds, in fact, quite glorious: the great verb "follow" sheds glory on the negative verbs that call for renunciation and death."

I think it was Mark Batterson who said, "A change of pace, plus a change of place, equals spiritual growth." Certainly doing this kind of job qualifies, if one uses it as an opportunity for spiritual growth.

How might you avail yourself to an opportunity of spiritual growth?

The Secrets of Military Leadership

From WaPo: Here is an assorted compendium of reflections from various journalists, et. al., who have answered some of the questions why the American public has such a high trust level and respect for her Military Leadership. How might some of this translate to the Church? What aspects of leadership are they doing right?

Favorite Thing about Iraq and My Reverse Bucket List

This energy drink that I've only seen in Iraq is really good. I like the taste way better than any I've tasted back in the States: "Wild Tiger." Forget about sleeping if you drink one of these. Energy drinks like Red Bull, Monster, etc., are staple methods for liquidation, if you you can get your hands on some. I know, I just used the word liquidation in a new way. But, this Wild Tiger is the bomb.

Barbara asked me about my Bucket List. Things I want to do when I get home. Well, I'm still thinking about things I want to be removed from, like far far away. No offense to any Iraqi friends.

1. Indirection Fire (IDF). This means mortars and rockets--RPGs and 107mm. I got to see all three in a personal way.

2. IEDs/EFP, especially the latter. That is the Iranian version of an IED. It explodes and shoots out 1 to 4 (array) molten copper (most effective) or steal slugs, that are larger than softball size.

3. This goes along with #1 and #2. Driving on Route Predators or Route Plutos, the deadliest roads in Baghdad.

4. The almost constant stench of burning garbage and ubiquitous sewage.

5. This really could be #1. The absence of my wife and kids. Yeah, that could be on the bucket list. But, the sense of loneliness and absence of Family is painful enough to say I'm ready to leave that feeling behind.

6. No longer shaving with a bottle of water, sometimes on the hood of a 1151 HMMWV.

7. No longer carrying around a tourniquet in my lower right pocket. It's just awkward to think about having to save your own limb or someone else's on a daily basis, as it's just one reminder of potential danger. Oh yeah, and so you don't bleed out too.

8. Crazy sleep schedule. We own the night.

9. Regular Army chow.

10. The heat. I'm ready for four seasons.

And, one more. 11. The multiple-times-a-day Muslim Call to Prayer.